tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post8970623922250232630..comments2024-03-03T22:02:43.757-04:00Comments on Quiet Laughter: A to Z: Motherhood and its consequencesGuilie Castillohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006999087139126972noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-5476368191378996322012-04-20T10:46:29.210-04:002012-04-20T10:46:29.210-04:00Hey thanks for visiting my blog and commenting on ...Hey thanks for visiting my blog and commenting on my "Quirky" post! It seems you have thought through your decision not to have kids. I have a close friend who has chosen not to have kids too. We've talked about it a lot over the years we've known each other. It's great to have a friend who views the world from a different perspective and to still be able to find common ground. It's humbling and enriching to one's life I believe.Sherri Lackeyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12574448009541412249noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-42818160769066941992012-04-17T22:33:24.380-04:002012-04-17T22:33:24.380-04:00I love this post! I don't want children eithe...I love this post! I don't want children either, and can't wait to be past the age when I can have them so people will stop with the "well in a few more years" bit.Danielle L Zecherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01492742250595537348noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-70018394533943695252012-04-16T16:34:31.158-04:002012-04-16T16:34:31.158-04:00Great post! I am a mom, but certainly don't th...Great post! I am a mom, but certainly don't think it's the right choice for everyone. After my daughter was born for like 10 years people kept asking when we were going to have another one. I alternated between "Why? Do you have one for sale?" and "David can have another one, he jsut has to find a girlfriend."carolhttp://carolsnotebook.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-55672636816769404802012-04-16T00:39:12.465-04:002012-04-16T00:39:12.465-04:00Another A to Z traveler here -- and even though I ...Another A to Z traveler here -- and even though I am a mom, and a stepmom, I thoroughly enjoyed your post. Now I shall read on.Patricia Stolteyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17192369425956406122noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-28018533001710341292012-04-15T14:25:40.936-04:002012-04-15T14:25:40.936-04:00I am stopping by from the A-Z Challenge. A great p...I am stopping by from the A-Z Challenge. A great post and I have subscribed to keep up with the posts.<br /><br />(http://www.anglersrest.net)Julie Goucherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11368170005503879489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-26319057060539060452012-04-14T21:34:35.908-04:002012-04-14T21:34:35.908-04:00I love this post! its not something that most peop...I love this post! its not something that most people talk about. I also have no wish to have kids but then I actually love kids. I love hanging out with them and watching them learn. I know I would be a gret mum but I just have no desire to reproduce.I'm a bit weird like that. I can hardly commit to a cell phone plan or paying more than a hundred bucks for a pair of shoes so the thought of a life long commitment to that level of responsibility is beyond comprehension. I dont think that the reason for the choice matters. It's way more selfish to bring an unwanted child into the world than it is to conciously make the choice not to!!!Big Life Little Countryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08455154591036519975noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-48381379497440129622012-04-14T19:03:41.663-04:002012-04-14T19:03:41.663-04:00I highly recommend menopause.
Beyond that, having...I highly recommend menopause.<br /><br />Beyond that, having children hardly spares one from the judgments of others: "When are you having your next one?" "You DON'T want them to be too far apart in age!" "Surely you breastfeed!" "You LET them eat that/(junk food/health food)?" "You're pregnant and you drank THAT?" "You SPANKED your child? I would NEVER BEAT mine!" "I feel sorry for mothers who are happy when their children are in school." yada, etc., blah blah. It goes on and on. Only in the teen years do parents become compassionate toward one another. The teenagers pulverize them into submission, basically. <br /><br />It's a wonder any of us survives.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-86335444062868329552012-04-14T16:32:04.354-04:002012-04-14T16:32:04.354-04:00Such a thoughtful post. I must admit, Guilie, that...Such a thoughtful post. I must admit, Guilie, that this part really made me laugh: "And this person, all sweet and polite and primped up, expects you to accept Christ (or Mormon or Jehova or whatever) as your personal savior right there at your doorstep, all before the lasagna is ruined." LOL—love that.<br /><br />My daughter is a lovely, wonderful, talented young woman who’s passionate about travel. She made the decision not to have kids. Like you, she's not all that crazy about them and knows she couldn't invest the time or patience necessary to raise children in the right manner. I think she’s smart & savvy for realizing that—and certainly not selfish whatsoever. But she gets pressured all the time by her friends (the ones with kids) and made to feel ashamed and/or guilty because of her choice. Pity.Susan Bodendo/Super Earthlinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10552499547660991944noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-27021192904641391542012-04-14T15:55:23.129-04:002012-04-14T15:55:23.129-04:00I've never understood why having children is t...I've never understood why having children is the default. I think that people should think long and hard before they have kids. And this is coming from a wannabe breeder. Anyway, just ignore. Honestly, I'll bet that half the time they're really wanting to talk about their OWN kids, and hassling you is just their entry point.Stephaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00420841652300294215noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-1365626830841896002012-04-14T13:08:34.290-04:002012-04-14T13:08:34.290-04:00This is a decision each woman must make.
Just st...This is a decision each woman must make. <br /><br />Just stand firm in what you want. There are advantages and disadvantages to both choices. I'm a mother, but when I was younger I thought differently. I had to meet the right man before I would consider it.<br /><br />Thanks for visiting my blog!D.G. Hudsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06213237734772028645noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-54021963919179061892012-04-14T12:54:08.433-04:002012-04-14T12:54:08.433-04:00Great post (thanks for visiting my blog so I could...Great post (thanks for visiting my blog so I could find yours). I have many friends who have made this decision and since they are in their 50-60's, made it in an era that was even more pro-childbearing. Good for you, knowing what you want and need as well as sticking to your guns.<br /><br />As much as I love my kids and grandkids, I know in many ways I shouldn't have had any. But life tosses us curveballs and we duck. ;-)<br /><br />As to religion, you are right on. I love to say my religion is based upon a Native American saying. "Let everything you do be your religion and everything you say your prayer."Donna B. McNicolhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15209611782116113024noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-20701745094476031752012-04-14T11:55:57.048-04:002012-04-14T11:55:57.048-04:00Hahahaha--Agreed on the material, Cindy. It's ...Hahahaha--Agreed on the material, Cindy. It's a "sacrifice" worth making, in my professional-writer opinion :D<br /><br />I don't know about the "successful, happy" part--I don't feel very successful, and... Well, happiness is a state of mind, isn't it? I'm certainly no paragon of How To Live One's Life, hahaha! I have nothing but admiration for moms, and especially one as wonderful as you.Guilie Castillohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09006999087139126972noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-8756051790203108302012-04-14T11:51:03.722-04:002012-04-14T11:51:03.722-04:00Janna, so true--especially the courage part. Botto...Janna, so true--especially the courage part. Bottom-line for me: I'm too scared to have kids :) You're right about there being different ways to be a parent, and I'm glad you and your husband have found a balance for it that makes you happy. In the end, that's all that counts--and your children will be better humans because of it. <br /><br />Thanks for stopping by!Guilie Castillohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09006999087139126972noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-45819872612701864842012-04-14T11:49:08.093-04:002012-04-14T11:49:08.093-04:00Haha--Bob, I'd love to meet her! I also have f...Haha--Bob, I'd love to meet her! I also have four dogs, and since I live so far away from my family, I'm hard-pressed to find a "babysitter". She's lucky to have you!Guilie Castillohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09006999087139126972noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-69407798889920754822012-04-14T11:48:18.096-04:002012-04-14T11:48:18.096-04:00Glad you liked it, Francene. I know motherhood is ...Glad you liked it, Francene. I know motherhood is a hot button for many people, so I did debate on writing this post. Still, it's *me* :) You're so right about each person being unique (and thanks for considering me special). One day, I hope, that uniqueness will elicit respect instead of criticism. Wouldn't *that* make for a wonderful world?Guilie Castillohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09006999087139126972noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-7914977779023238682012-04-14T10:36:19.395-04:002012-04-14T10:36:19.395-04:00Great post, Guilie. I laughed really hard at parts...Great post, Guilie. I laughed really hard at parts. Sometimes we women judge each other too harshly. Personally, I think a lot of that stems from jealousy.<br /><br />Rick and I always knew we wanted children - would never go back and do it differently, but of course there are times we look at our lives and wonder how different things could be. A less secure woman might react badly when confronted with a successful, happy woman such as yourself.<br /><br />For me, not having children may have meant paying attention to my writing much earlier in my life. But I would have a heck of a lot less material! Hahahahahaha.Cindy Dwyerhttp://cynthiadwyer.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-75099691142862314102012-04-14T09:10:13.904-04:002012-04-14T09:10:13.904-04:00I'm a mother of two, soon to be three, and I a...I'm a mother of two, soon to be three, and I agree that not everyone should, or should want to have kids. I also respect that it takes a lot of courage to say so. Still, there are many different ways to be a parent. You can decide to forego all identities except for "Mom," to recreate your past so it's sparkling clean, to give up all outside social activities, but you don't have to. My husband and I do pretty much everything we did before we had children, albeit in different ways. I don't feel that others are missing out by not being parents, nor do I feel that I'm missing out because I don't get to sleep in, or I can't hit the bars every weekend.<br /><br />Very good post with lots to think about.Jannahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01526270041449395216noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-62469605616671368132012-04-14T05:57:35.507-04:002012-04-14T05:57:35.507-04:00I think you and my daughter would get on well toge...I think you and my daughter would get on well together. Mind you we have to sit for her dogs once a year!Bob Scotneyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00662958579705940009noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7436812892124383603.post-8282619272524452862012-04-14T05:18:38.311-04:002012-04-14T05:18:38.311-04:00This is so funny, Guillie, and so right. I couldn&...This is so funny, Guillie, and so right. I couldn't agree more--with all of it. Let's be free to live our life the way we want. If we seek another way to find God, we can get the information on our own. If a sudden maternal desire hits us, we'll follow that avenue. Each person is unique. And you're special just the way you are.Francene Stanleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08298485336064691700noreply@blogger.com