The Listing Hop!

Happy Monday, and bon siman! 

(That's 'happy week' in Papiamentu, the language of Curaçao—and if you ever do come to Curaçao, make a note: all your greetings on Monday need to be accompanied by that... Under penalty of being classified as another rude foreigner ;) )

Today's the day for Bish Denham's

Listing Hop!

Rules:

Make a list. Any list. Sign up at Bish's page and join the fun. Here's mine:

Top ten twenty-two fifteen pieces of writing advice

(in no particular order)

Remember that, sooner or later, before it ever reaches perfection, you will have to let it go and move on and start to write the next thing. Perfection is like chasing the horizon. Keep moving.

No. 6 in Neil Gaiman's 8 Rules of Writing

Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia.

No. 7 on Kurt Vonnegut's 8 Tips to Write a Great Story

Avoid your weaknesses. But do this without telling yourself that the things you can’t do aren’t worth doing. Don’t mask self-doubt with contempt.

No. 4 in Zadie Smith's 10 Rules of Writing

Tell the truth through whichever veil comes to hand — but tell it. Resign yourself to the lifelong sadness that comes from never ­being satisfied.

No. 10 in Zadie Smith's 10 Rules of Writing

Writing is a little door. Some fantasies, like big pieces of furniture, won’t come through.

From Susan Sontag's thoughts on writing

A writer, like an athlete, must ‘train’ every day. What did I do today to keep in ‘form’?

From Susan Sontag's thoughts on writing

Have moral intelligence — which creates true authority in a writer.

From Susan Sontag's thoughts on writing

You cannot write the pages you love without writing the pages you hate.

Robin Black, 21 Things I Wish I'd Known Before I Started Writing

Exaggeration is not a way of altering reality but of seeing it. 

Mario Vargas Llosa, History of a Deicide, speaking about Gabriel García Márquez 

(my translation from the Spanish)

Ordinary language is an accretion of lies. The language of literature must be, therefore, the language of transgression, a rupture of individual systems, a shattering of psychic oppression. The only function of literature lies in the uncovering of the self in history.

From Susan Sontag's thoughts on writing

If you are using dialogue—say it aloud as you write it. Only then will it have the sound of speech.

No. 6 of John Steinbeck's 6 Tips on Writing

Write freely and as rapidly as possible and throw the whole thing on paper. Never correct or rewrite until the whole thing is down. Rewrite in process is usually found to be an excuse for not going on. It also interferes with flow and rhythm which can only come from a kind of unconscious association with the material.

No. 2 of John Steinbeck's 6 Tips on Writing

You most likely need a thesaurus, a rudimentary grammar book, and a grip on reality. This latter means: there’s no free lunch. Writing is work. It’s also gambling. You don’t get a pension plan. Other people can help you a bit, but ­essentially you’re on your own. ­Nobody is making you do this: you chose it, so don’t whine.

No. 7 of Margaret Atwood's 10 Rules of Writing

The more abstract a truth which one wishes to teach, the more one must first entice the senses.

No. 8 of Nietzsche's 10 Rules for Writers

The richness of life reveals itself through a richness of gestures. One must learn to feel everything — the length and retarding of sentences, interpunctuations, the choice of words, the pausing, the sequence of arguments — like gestures.

No. 5 of Nietzsche's 10 Rules for Writers

***

Hooked? Here's a fabulous compilation of writerly advice, via Brainpickings.

Speaking of writer wisdom, tomorrow I'll be over at Sam Redstreake's awesome blog sharing a pearl of my own on how music helps with writing... 
(With some outrageously wonderful music, of course.)
AAANNNDD — drum roll, please — also to celebrate the e-book release of
THE MIRACLE OF SMALL THINGS!
Come on over tomorrow and help me thank Sam for hosting me.

Want more lists? You'll find the complete list of Listing Hop List-makers at Bish's page... Hop on over and pay them a visit.

What's your favorite piece of writing advice? Inquiring (list-making) minds would love to know. And I looooove comments :)

Karnaval! (2015 edition)

Karnaval (Carnival) in Curaçao is the event of the year. Half the island's 150K population participates in one way or another: either they're part of a 'walking' group (the groups that make up the parade), or they're involved in the costume design or the organization or providing assistance to the groups. And the other half is gathered on the sidewalks throughout Sunday afternoon and Tuesday evening to watch--and dance, and sing, and drink. I cannot imagine the amounts of beer that get consumed during the two days of Karnaval, but it's a lot.

I've been wanting to take photos of Karnaval for this blog for a while, but I can't seem to drum up enough energy to put myself through the crowds and the loud, loud music. And besides, much better photographers are, thankfully, present. Check out the Curaçao Images album on Flicker, and have a wild dance to celebrate Dushi Korsou!

The Friend (of a friend)

Silvia Villalobos, an exemplary writer friend of mine--exemplary both as a writer and as a friend--has a short story up at Red Fez. Take a hop over, spread the love. The read is a ride of careening tension that doesn't let up. My stomach is still in knots--and will be whenever I think of this story. Friendship isn't always selfless, is it?

Brava, Silvia!

Writing "The Other" -- Daniel José Older @ BuzzFeed

Must-read. Whole thing here. My favorite:

6. This is life and death.

Having just said it’s about craft, let’s be clear that it’s also much more than that. This topic is usually couched in language like “offensive” or “PC.” It’s a topic for debate, a cute little back-and-forth. This is all a condescending and dehumanizing frame for the conversation. We’re talking about the continued silencing and erasure of voices that mainstream white male culture has always silenced and erased. We’re talking about life and death of entire peoples; we’re talking about self-worth and humanity. And even as adults, we’re barely figuring how to deal with negative imagery. Kids haven’t been given any of the tools we have and they see it more than anyone else. High suicide rates and internalized racial/gender oppression are real.

We can’t keep raising generations of kids of color on the notion that there’s only room for them to be bad guys or doomed sidekicks or another generation of white kids thinking they’re closer to God because of how they look. We can’t keep promoting hetero/cis-normative sexist and racist ideas in our literature. That is the default setting. If you aren’t consciously working against it, you are working for it. Neutrality is not an option, and the luxury of thinking it is has to go. To quote Junot once again: “I think that unless you are actively, consciously working against the gravitational pull of the culture, you will predictably, thematically, create these sort of fucked-up representations. Without fail. The only way not to do them is to admit to yourself [that] you’re fucked up, admit to yourself that you’re not good at this shit, and to be conscious in the way that you create these characters.”

Who said the writer community doesn't TOTALLY rock?

The best gift EVER: an unsolicited review of my story in the January volume of Pure Slush's 2014 Project (read it for free on the Amazon preview here) by friend and fellow writer (and fellow IWW member) Silvia Villalobos. Read the review here.

How sweet is that?

She didn't even tell me she wrote it. I found it two days after the fact, and then only because I follow her blog. Which you totally should if you don't already. She has that incisiveness I so admire in writers, that way of cutting through the surface to get at the source of what makes us human, what makes us better... Or, sometimes, worse.

Silvia, thank you. You're a wonderful, wonderful friend.

I Think; Therefore, I Yam: The Cold Truth

A Finnish scale of temperatures, with helpful comparisons--for all of us non-Finns--with the rest of Europe. The last line cracks me up every time.

• +15 --- Spanish wear caps, gloves, and winter coats; Finns are sunbathing.
• +10 --- French desperately try to get their central heating on; Finns plant flowers.
• + 5 --- Italian cars won't start; Finns drive convertibles.
•    0 --- Pure water freezes; water in River Vantaa thickens a bit.
• - 5 --- First people are found frozen in California; Finnish midsummer festival ends.
• -10 --- Scots turn the heat on in their houses; Finns start to wear long-sleeved shirts.
• -20 --- Swedes stay indoors; Finns are having last barbecue before winter.
• -30 --- Half of the Greek people have been frozen to death; Finns start to dry laundry indoors.
• -50 --- Polar bears evacuate North Pole; Finnish army starts its winter training.
• -70 --- Siberians are moving to Moscow; Finns are furious, because their Kiskenkorva liquor can't be stored outdoors anymore.
• -273 --- Absolute zero; Finns admit that it is quite cold outside.
• -300 --- Hell freezes over; Finland wins the World Cup.

Visit I Think; Therefore, I Yam: The Cold Truth for more hilarity, including a priceless list headed "How Cold Was It?" It was so cold that... Hitchhikers were holding out pictures of thumbs. Starbucks started selling coffee on a stick. Oh, there's more, much more. Brilliant humor from this marvelous woman who's trying to figure out if she's "a writer who blogs or a blogger who writes"--which, of course, we should *all* be doing.

And... My heart stopped.

I'm not a fan of technology. Sure I love my laptop, and my (relatively easy, given I live in an island) access to internet. I love electricity, and downloading whole TV series otherwise unaccessible (I live in an island). I love downloading books, too, although e-readers, like a pragmatic lover, still leave me somewhat unsatisfied. I love my phone, and how easy it is to stay in touch with people: Whatsapp, Twitter, Facebook, G+.

But I hate how phones have come to rule our lives. I hate how people jump to them whenever a random piece of trivia comes up: "Who was President in 1964?" "What's the name of that singer that died in...?" "Oh, man, that movie with the guy with the big nose--no, not the French one."

Given the above, it feels contradictory--hypocritical--to admit the first thing I do as I wake up is check my phone. Email. Blogs. Facebook. As I brush my teeth, get into halfway decent clothes (i.e., no pajamas, but close) to go check on the dogs and make my tea. And as I'm doing this, as I'm scrolling through whatever email came in as I slept, whatever notifications Facebook sent me, I'm thinking about hypocrisy, about how it's become so urgent, this needing to know, and why I can't wait the ten minutes it would take to go boot up my computer and do this in a screen that doesn't require so much damn scrolling.

And then there's days like today. Actually, no. There's never been a day like today, but--

Merry Christmas!

It's an oldie, but it always makes me laugh. Happy holidays!

(From Jim's Joke Repository)

HOLIDAY FRUITCAKE RECIPE.

You'll need the following:1 cup of water 1 cup of sugar 4 large brown eggs 2 cups of dried fruit 1 teaspoon of salt 1 cup of brown sugar Lemon juice 1 cup of nuts 1 bottle of whiskey.   Sample the whiskey to check for quality.  Take a large bowl. Check the whiskey again. To be sure it's the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again.  Make sure the whiskey is still okay. Cry another tup. Turn off the mixer. Beat two leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Mix on the tuner. If the fired druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.  Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who cares? Check the whiskey. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something. Whatever you can find.  Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window. Check the whiskey again and go to bed.

NaNo isn't just about winning. Is it?

We Wrimos get pep talks every day during November (and beyond). Catherynne M. Valente (who?), James Patterson (oh, I know him), Rainbow Rowell (who?). Today's is from Patrick Rothfuss, another who? for me and an author whose genre I normally read only if I'm stranded in an airport and I've already read everything else in the bookstore. 

I'm not kidding. I haven't read Games of Thrones. No plans to remedy that. The TV series is enough for me.

But Pat is wise. So much, indeed, that I might give the first book of his trilogy a try (assuming I can find it in this literary poverty zone that is my island).

Embellishment--or insight?

Eternal gratitude, Janet Reid, for sharing this (a while back) and (more recently) this example on Spare and Elegant Writing.

Does this resonate as much with you as it did with me? How far are you along in the process of simplifying yourself? We all know adverbs must be avoided, substituted with stronger verbs. What other pitfalls have you discovered in your own writing?

Stephen King on Voice vs. Style & Opening Sentences

We interrupt the Friendship in Curaçao series to bring you a must-read article in The Atlantic. Stephen King talks about the difference between voice and style, and that demon that haunts all of us writers: opening sentences, and why he spends so long (months, years even) working on them.

Go read it. I'll wait.

Done? Now pray tell: how do *you* handle your first sentences? Are you King-ish in the time you spend on them? Do your stories bloom from a fabulous opening, or do you get the story down and then work on the opening? Like King, do you remember any exceptional ones you've written? Feel free to share if so inclined :)

I've been reblogged!

(Image taken from this website)

In June 2011, when I began my blogger equivalent of an eight-month baby attempting to spoon beet purée into its mouth--unsupervised--I had no clue what I was in for. Two years later I can say, mouth overflowing sincerity, that my expectations about blogging were waaaaaay off.
I never imagined I'd have followers--let alone 200! Yep, we broke the bicentenary barrier this month. You guys--yeah, all of you--you rock.

A big HURRAH for you!

A to Z: A is for Antilles

Welcome to the searing energy of the A to Z Blogging Challenge! This year Quiet Laughter has picked an A-to-Z of FAQs to unveil for you, beloved audience, the secrets of the island life.

Where--and what--the heck is Curaçao?

Because we've got to start somewhere, let's go with where.

Click on the image to enlarge it. Pretty cool map.

The Antilles (ant-EE-lees in English, antees in French) is just a fancy name for the Caribbean islands. You know, that archipelago that creates a curve from the tip of the Yucatan peninsula to Venezuela, and which encloses the Caribbean sea.

At the top you've got the Greater Antilles--that's to say, the big islands: Cuba, Hispaniola (Dominican Republic and Haiti), Puerto Rico, and Jamaica. The Cayman Islands are also included, although they're anything but big.

(Which, once again, proves that size has nothing to do with anything.)

I want to see these movies!

Oh, you grammar Nazis, you...

I'm one. I admit it. I'm even proud of it.

(Yeah, I taught English for ten years.)

I hate it when people misuse punctuation. Misspelled words--the classic affect vs. effect, for example, or confidant instead of confident, and the ever-present confusion of it's and its--make my teeth ache. My nerve endings cringe when I read sentences like, "If I would've seen it..."

And don't get me started on the new-generation text-type spellings of UR and THX and GR8. Hoo-hah, great time savers, those. What do people do with the thousands of hours saved by typing UR instead of you're, I wonder?

Pixar's 22 Rules of Storytelling

Found this via Janet Reid's blog this morning--thank you, Janet!

Pixar storyboard artist Emma Coates shares tweets on storyteller wisdom at io9.com. Truly, *must* read.

I'm an author! (On Goodreads)

Thanks to Pure Slush and GORGE: A Novel in Stories, I now have an author page on Goodreads.

How cool is that? :D Can't wait for my first fan, haha.

Copycat

The awesome editor at Pure Slush invited me to be their featured author this January. What does that mean, exactly? Well, I needed to provide four shorts (500 max) to be published in the Pure Slush e-mag, one per week, for their copycat theme.

Whoa. Copycat? Copycat?

I'm in print!

A nice milestone to close my first whole year of being a writer: I get to see my words on an actual, physical, print publication. 

A novel-length book published by Pure Slush, GORGE, a novel in stories, contains a piece of mine (Dessert), and is available as of today for purchase via Lulu.

I ordered three. Cannot wait for delivery :D

50 Best Literary Insults (Thank you, ShortList)

You have favorite lines from Shakespeare, don't you? Roald Dahl, Margaret Atwood, James Joyce? Lines so poignant, so rife with truth that they dropped like smooth riverstones into the still pond of your mind, that you felt the ripples to the tips of your fingers?

Of course you do.