#atozchallenge: Zoology

2014: A Year In Stories
A twelve-volume anthology published by Pure Slush Books

I want to end on a light note. Some of the posts in this series got a little ponderous, a tad heavy on the wank--which is ironic, since Pure Slush's slogan is Flash... Without the Wank.

The 2014 project is a landmark happening, and all of us participating are honored to be a part of it, but that doesn't give us--me, at least--the right to take myself so seriously.

Writing is meant to be fun. Yes, it's hard work--especially if one wants to get good enough to play in the big leagues--but I hope life will always find ways to lighten me up.

And this is why I give you the Find your Inner Animal quiz!

Worldwildlife.org

Thank you, Hans Pleij
and CURious2Dive,  for the photo--
and for the amazing dives!

Some of the 2014 authors who were in the mood to play along with me and my--sophomoric-ness? sophomoricity?--took the test for themselves or their 2014 characters--or both.

Gay Degani, whose work you read in several of this series' posts, and who's not just part of the 2014 project but also editor at Every Day Fiction, and just had a novel published, is

an octopus. 

(Somehow I'm not surprised.)

Mandy Nicol, who's participated extensively in the A-to-Z series for the 2014 project, and who's a fellow animal lover with whom I hope I'm establishing the foundations for a good friendship (even though we live continents apart), is 

a Moose.

Mandy was also the only brave author to volunteer her 2014 protag for the test. Nadia--the seamstress that lives with her mom and gets badgered by her sister, and who'd have no problem at all with a one-night stand (if it happened out of town; otherwise there'd be talk)--is 

a Great White Shark.

(I wonder if she herself knows about her potential to, uh, bite.)

(Image credit)

Stephen V. Ramey, the other author who contributed more material and insight to this A-to-Z series than I could've ever asked for, who's given the project a huge boost by reviewing the day's story every day, and whose 2014 series has a suspiciously eponymous protagonist (although the author insists it's not, at least not completely, autobiographical), is 

a Lynx.

(Hmmmm...)

I'm trying hard not to take my own result personally. You'd be sensitive about it, too, if you'd been born in a country where the average height was three inches shorter than yours. I never learned to walk in high heels--in ballet slippers I was already taller than everyone around me (except my dad, who, we therefore assume, is to blame for the whole issue to begin with). The test says I'm...

Not funny.
(Image credit)

a Giraffe.

Luis Villalobos, my character from the 2014 project--the superstar tax attorney, soon-to-be Managing Director at a prime firm, who perceives himself as the prototype of an A personality, the lion of the herd, the Alpha male (and doesn't the fact he's sleeping with his boss--that's right, the MD he's going to replace next year--prove that?)--poor, delusional Luis came out as 

a Big Horn Sheep.

(The "big horn" part doesn't come even close to mitigating the shame of the "sheep" bit. Poor Luis. One wonders if he'll keep fighting to be a lion, or if he'll embrace his nature--and, perhaps, come to be happier. You can read Luis's progress stories for free in the Amazon previews of the January, February, March, April, and May books. The May one is happening tomorrow!)

I'm a lion in sheep's clothing. Hear me BAAAAAAAA!
(Image credit)

And you? If you have a minute to play, go take the test. Are you the animal you expected? Did the result reveal something surprising about yourself?

Most importantly, will you not-so-solemnly swear to do something every day to remind yourself that life shouldn't be taken so seriously?

~ * ~

Thank you for the company on this A-to-Z journey. I apologize for the late posts, the misposts, the long-windedness. I hope you enjoyed discovering these authors as much as I've enjoyed telling you about them, and if you do get a chance to read the books (all or some) in the 2014 series, please do come back and tell me what you think. 

Looking forward to returning all your blogger love during May!

#atozchallenge: Uganda, Ukraine, Uruguay, or Union Square?

Uganda

Exotic (to a Westerner like me), alien, hard to get to. A challenge.

Ukraine 

The seat of current conflict, a long and bloody history; the sort of place a wanna-be journalist might dream of visiting.

Uruguay

New Zealand in South America. A quasi-mythical place or a tax haven (depending on how you found out of its existence). 

Union Square

Familiar and safe, even to those who've never been to San Francisco (or even the U.S.).

So. Which of these places would your 2014 character most likely be found?

2014: A Year In Stories
A twelve-volume anthology published by Pure Slush Books

Uruguay! Because it is the hardest to say. Trudy would probably end up on a cattle farm that's going broke so she has to supplement her income with rodeo shows--but in pidgin Spanish.

Or something like that.

Sally-Anne Macomber

Union Square.
Mandy Nicol

Luis Villalobos thinks he'd choose Uganda. In truth, and given his career in international tax, chances are small he'd be anywhere but Union Square. Or Uruguay. But highly unlikely he'd cross paths with Trudy in her failing farm; he'd stick to the financial center in Montevideo.

Guilie Castillo

Under fences, bushes, shrubs--wherever Pedersen can watch but not be seen.
Susan Tepper

Sally-Anne, Mandy, and Guilie: Eww!
Susan: Yes, well. He's a creep.

And you? Uganda, Ukraine, Uruguay, or Union Square? 

~ * ~ 

Thanks for the visit, and happy last full week of A-to-Z-ing!

#atozchallenge: Quandary

Nothing like a difficult situation to reveal character in fiction (and in real life). A really really difficult situation.

2014: A Year In Stories
A twelve-volume anthology published by Pure Slush Books

Q: Your character is trapped in a dark alley late at night with three men that don't seem to have honorable intentions. What does s/he do? Fight? Flight? Panic and go into hysterics? Sprout a pair of wings and fly away? 

(No, don't laugh--there's a 2014 character that flies. Sans wings, even.)

STEPHEN V. RAMEY: "As my story cycle opens, Stephen would be nonchalant about such an encounter. He has no money, nothing much of worth, and yet he's not going to let these men intimidate him into giving up what little he does have. He might try to reason. Failing that he would defend himself if necessary, even if it meant a beat down. Once the cancer diagnosis is in, he might actually confront these men, and egg them on. On some level he's looking for a way to prove (to whom?) that he deserves to survive. He's trying to turn his life into a story, with purpose and a resolution."

(More on Stephen's 2014 stories.)

SUSAN TEPPER: "What would Pedersen do? He would probably piss his pants. He is mistrustful of grown men. His father beat the crap out of him. In Bellevue, he came out of shock therapy to an orderly fondling his genitals. He likes the small boys so he can always be in control."

(More on Susan's 2014 stories.)

MANDY NICOL: "As long as Nadia has her sensible shoes on, she’ll make a run for it."

(More on Mandy's 2014 stories.)

GUILIE: Luis Villalobos would probably try to talk his way out of it. (He's a lawyer.) He'd be too busy evaluating possible escape routes, gauging the attackers' level of distraction, keeping his facial expressions in check, to feel fear. But once it was over, assuming he got away safe and sound, he'd probably curl up somewhere where no one could see or hear him and bawl his eyes out.

(More on my 2014 stories? An interview and an audio version of the first story.)

~ * ~

What would your character do? What about favorite characters--say, Atticus Finch, or Odysseus? Walter White? Florentino Ariza (from Love In The Time of Cholera)? Oh, and his beloved Fermina Daza? Of the two, I'm pretty sure she'd be the kick-ass. 

And you? What would you do? What does that say about you?

~ * ~

Thank you for visiting on this beautiful April Saturday, and happy A-to-Z-ing!

#atozchallenge: Kiss & Tell

2014: A Year In Stories
A twelve-volume anthology published by Pure Slush Books

My first kiss was beautiful. Maybe even Disney corny. It happened after (not during, mind you; that would've been sleazy) seeing the movie Some Kind Of Wonderful at the theater on a Thursday afternoon.

(Maybe it was a Monday. Or a Wednesday. What? It was a long time ago.)

It was soft, and intense, and long. And I was in love with the guy even before he kissed me. He was my first love, and we were together for seven years.

But, apparently, I'm a minority. At least as far as the characters of the 2014 project are concerned.

Nadia refuses to count her first kiss as the time Robbie Hill tried to shove his tongue down her throat during a spin the bottle game at school camp. So she jumps forward to when Tom McKinnon kissed her at her thirteenth birthday party, back when he still treated her like his best mate's kid sister, back long before they started going out together. That brief, unexpected, innocent brush of lips across her left cheek, that's the first kiss she wants to remember. (MANDY NICOL)

(Keep in mind that this is not (entirely) autobiographical.) Stephen first kissed Anne standing on the doorstep of an apartment house where their writing group had just met. They had been meeting in the group for more than a year, but Stephen remained oblivious to her interest. Intensely introverted, he had given up on love by this point (he was in his late twenties) and immersed himself in his work and a few hobbies, one of which was fiction writing. He saw Anne as a pleasant fellow writer with a talent for story structure. (STEPHEN V. RAMEY)

Mark Hamilton's first kiss was at 15. He was helping to unload the assistant coach's minivan at an amateur baseball tournament. He was not unaware of girls, but his concentration on athletics did not leave a lot of room for socializing. The assistant coach's stepdaughter stopped him as he was removing a long canvas bag of bats from the back of the van. She stood unusually close to him, her dusty painted toes inches from his baseball spikes, and wrapped her arms around him when he straightened up. Smelling like Pepsi, she leaned in close and pressed herself against him. They kissed, and she whispered, "Good luck today, Marky." Whether coincidence or not, he struck out 12 in 7 innings and hit a home run that day. (MICHAEL WEBB)

Luis Villalobos was ten. There was a girl he sort-of liked, sort-of hated--you know how at that age inter-gender relationships are weird like that--and one day in the school yard he cornered her in the alley between two buildings. He was after her Hershey's chocolate bar, the kind that back then wasn't available in Mexico and had to be imported from the US. But when the girl gave up the bar, he changed his mind and lunged in for a kiss instead. Well, "kiss"... The girl screamed and ran away with a bloody lip, and Luis bore a tooth-shaped bruise on his chin for the two weeks he was grounded. But the nickname Vampiro stuck for much longer than that. (GUILIE CASTILLO)

~ * ~

What was your first kiss like? Did it live up to your expectations, or did it happen before you had any expectations? What is a first kiss, anyway? Do we agree with Nadia that a spin-the-bottle mashing of lips doesn't count? And is a first kiss all that important to begin with?

Thanks for the visit, and happy A-to-Z-ing!

[You guys, I owe you an apology. I'm behind on posting, on replying to comments, on visits... I will catch up this weekend. I will be all over the internet, returning the love you've shared so generously. You're wonderful, all of you, and I'm honored every time you visit. Thank you!]

#atozchallenge: Jobs R Us

2014: A Year In Stories
A twelve-volume anthology published by Pure Slush Books

Does your occupation define you? Or does who you are define your occupation?

I submit that, in a world that relies on stereotypes, jobs become a part of society's perception of us--accurate or not. And fiction's no different. The work that a character does becomes a cornerstone of the image we create of this person.

Am I right or am I right?

These are the jobs some of the 2014 characters have. Unconventional, borderline stardom, eccentric, mundane. What kind of person do you think they are? Share in the comments; I'd love to know.

MATT POTTER: Morgana Malone starts the series on her first day (Jan 25th) in a new volunteer position: guide in an art gallery. In February she's working as the Admin Junior in her ex-husband's therapy practice, 'up-managing' the Admin Senior, the ex-porn star Zebadie who is set to marry Morgana's ex-husband Grigor. (Zebadie can't use a computer for the patient billing while Morgana can.) Through the middle of the year she is unemployed and spending too much time on the internet. Then she takes a job delivering junk mail for 'Knights of the Polish Cross' sauvignon blanc. Later, under family pressure, she starts work in the family business, a bakery... and just what she is doing by the end, in December, who knows... But the last day will be Christmas Day so it may well involve food and Christmas cheer.

SUSAN TEPPER: Pedersen doesn't make a living, he collects checks from his stint at Desert Storm. They probably discharged him on mental disability.

MANDY NICOL: Nadia is a seamstress. She loves fabric and colour and fashion and creating with her hands. She's a very good seamstress. She works from home--great idea, hey? Be your own boss, work your own hours, no commute to deal with. Except she lives with her demanding and overbearing mother so she is slowly but very surely suffocating.

MICHAEL WEBB: Mark Hamilton is an American professional baseball player, specifically a short reliever. He is not a star, but is very well compensated, and has managed to earn a good living through his career. He is a somewhat fungible commodity, valuable, but not special, someone who gets the team out of a sticky late game situation, ideally preserving a lead so that the team's star reliever can come in and earn the save and the glory at the end. His team is never specifically named, but he and his family live in Arizona full time, since his oldest son is now in elementary school.

He is uncomfortable with the fame and money that comes with so simple a profession, but he has no other really marketable skills, so he is somewhat happy to keep doing it for as long as they wish to pay him to do so. He understands the necessity of the constant travel, but he misses his family, specifically his daughter, who he barely knows because he has been gone for so much of her life. He also knows well that the attrition rate for professional pitchers is very high, so he constantly fears a career ending injury that would force him to get a real job.

STEPHEN V. RAMEY: Stephen is a writer, which at this point means he picks up a few dollars with nonfiction and editing, but is mostly focused on his fiction. The first three novels were never finished, but he's working on one now that's going to put him on the map. Anne manages a museum and volunteers with a local nonprofit. Stephen resents that she has sold out her dream. Anne resents that Stephen has sold out their marriage: if he worked part time, at least, life would be much easier.

Jobs are relevant to the story cycle, in that they provide tension between Stephen and Anne and narrative complication. Writing credentials get Stephen into the tent city and allow him to repeatedly avoid dealing with real problems. Anne's volunteer work brings them into direct conflict in one chapter.

GUILIE CASTILLO: Luis Villalobos is a tax lawyer, and a damned good one. His father is a lawyer, too; so was his grandfather, and two of his uncles. He got his first legal dictionary when he was seven, and he carried it around in his bookbag. It made him feel safe: he belonged in his family, his future was clear.

For Luis, his profession is a means to an end, and that end is fame and fortune. Fortune, first; fame only in the right circles. His profession is membership to the ultimate club of exclusivity. Which is why he came so close to turning down the Curaçao offer. A backwater in the Caribbean after the greatest financial centers of the world? But there was the possibility--certainty, if one read between the lines--of taking over as Managing Director next year. And that was irresistible.

~ * ~ 

What image did you form for these characters? Did you change your mind about whether a job defines you?

Thanks for visiting, and happy A-to-Z-ing!

#atozchallenge: D is for Dogs

What is Gracie thinking?

This is Gracie, Gus German's loyal companion (from Gay Degani's 2014 stories). She follows him on walks down to the creek, into the Trencher Mansion, and, most recently, helped to alert the neighborhood.

If she could talk, she'd be the Gracie Allen to Gus's George Burns. At the Mansion, for instance, an exchange like this would be perfectly plausible:

Gus: I presume the bedrooms are upstairs.
Gracie: Yes, except when you're upstairs. Then they're on the same floor.

#atozchallenge: Anthology of an Anthology

This April it's all about the 2014: A Year In Stories project I'm participating in via Pure Slush Books. (You were warned here.)

What is the 2014: A Year In Stories project?

A twelve-volume anthology, a volume per month, throughout 2014. The writers involved were assigned a specific date of the month, and they each write a story every month that takes place on that date. Mine, for example, is the 1st; my stories take place on Jan 1, Feb 1, Mar 1...

Yep: today is April 1st. A story of mine is happening. Interested? You can read it in the April volume's Amazon sample. You can also read Stephen V. Ramey's review here. (He reviews the day's story every day, and has been doing so since January 1st. A round of applause for Stephen, please!)